It's funny, when you are a kid you never really think about being grounded or feeling grounded. As a kid you just know that "being" grounded is a bad thing. And yet, as an adult.... we search for it, need it, desire it, and dream about it.
When we are grounded we feel stable, confident, asured, and in touch with ourselves. It's about accepting your faults, your gifts and everything in between. It means STOPPING and then being ok with your thoughts, yourself and things around you. BUT most of us go in and out of feeling grounded and the most difficult thing is to sometimes accept who we are, where we have been and why we are where we are.
Let's start with who we are...... I mean who really knows right? Most of us have been told who we are by our parents. She is shy, she is introverted, she is outgoing, she is nosey, she is popular, she is awkard, she is daddy's girl, she is- she is- she is.......... Sometimes we are told who we are by our friends. She is the crazy one, she is the party one, she is the fun buster, she is the drinker or dugger, she is ....... And then there is when our "partner" defines us. She is the nagger, the nit picker, the organizer, the planner, the talker, the bragger, the control freak.....
We can't forget how our roles tell us who we are too. We've addressed the daughter/son, the wife, the friend but there is also the role of mother/father, co-worker, mentor, peer, and I'm sure you can think of serveral others. So while "who we are" can be dictated to us, we also have who WE feel we are on the inside. For example you may have been told your whole life you are an extrovert but inside you don't enjoy groups of people and they cause you anxiety. That then becomes normal and you begin to think that ALL outgoing people must feel the same anxiety. But guess what, they don't!! But all of this also identifies where we have been, the roles that were chosen for us, we chose for ourselves and who we have identified with. ALL of this is the PAST.
Which now has brought you to where you are right now and where you are going. Where do we start? OH, I'm just going to tell you right now, it's not easy and you might not like it. But here goes.....
STOP!!! I was that girl that just couldn't stop! I felt like if I did STOP- all the bad things, choices, thoughts, and actions would come flooding in and I wasn't ready for that. In fact I was never going to be ready for that, I didn't want to be ready for that either. It didn't take me long (56 years) to know that if I didn't I was going to loose my mind. I would break and so will you! You can only run for so long before it all catches you and then it doesn't let go.
So it's ok! You will be ok! You can let it all in. You can think about it, you can see it, replay it, feel it and THEN we must face it! It's a lot, I know. Take 5-10 min a day to think about it. Then look in a mirror and forgive that younger version of yourself. Tell yourself, it WILL be ok YOU will be OK.
THINK for yourself. Imagine not thinking the way your parents did, your partner does, your children do...... YOU will be ok. YOU can think for yourself, YOU can be different. The most important person to love you, will still love you- and that person? IS YOU! You can feel different, express yourself in a different way, think differently!! STOP being invisable. You are special, different, wonderful...
Which leads me to the next thing, self love. It's time to stop putting yourself down and start lifting yourself up. STOP expecting acceptance, validation and praise from the people around you. The only person you need that from is the person looking back in the mirror at you. Incase you don't get that, THAT'S YOU!! If you are consistantly seeking positives from others then this is for you. Every day, and boy do I mean every day....... you look at yourself and say, "I am enough, I am strong, I have courage, I am my
own person." "I am wonderful, I am amazing, I am beautiful and I am me.".
It takes time to find yourself, find peace, forgive yourself and move forward. It takes time to learn to STOP and change the outside for the inside. BUT start today and ask yourself, who am I?! Do I feel gounded? Where do I need to begin to feel grounded in my life? Need help? Are you ready to really start living YOUR life? Then Courage Coach is ready for YOU!!
Uumf.... that was a lot!
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